Terrible Two's. Yeah yeah yeah. When I saw that shrieking toddler in the grocery store, I always thought less about the child and more about the reaction of the parent(s). Embarrassment? Anger? Frustration? Did they give in? Did they yell? Did they punish the child?
Having grown up always around children and babies, I had become fairly good at ignoring tantrums and fits. Of course, that becomes worlds harder when it is your own precious little angel kicking and thrashing in public. In my head, I celebrate Lilah's fierce desire for autonomy and independence. Outwardly, it's getting harder and harder to deal with without dissolving into a screaming fit of my own.
We went to the Royal Oak Farmer's Market this morning. Lilah was dressed in a beautiful new white dress with green and blue flowers embroidered on it. She had white socks with green flowers, and a white sweater with green and blue buttons. I had laid out the outfit thinking we were taking some family photos later, but the weather intervened. Dano dressed her while I brushed my teeth and I smiled to myself thinking how gorgeous she would look in the sunshine in her pretty new dress. I came out of the bathroom and my eyes were accosted by red laser lights. Lilah was wearing her darling outfit and had completed the ensemble with neon pink and orange light up sandals. I immediately nabbed her to change her shoes, but Dano wouldn't let me.
"She picked those shoes out herself. You can't change them." I started grinding my teeth and we compromised. Dano agreed to let me change her shoes to her white ones for a couple of pictures (that never ended up happening anyway) but I was to leave them on for the time being.
While we were out, Lilah decided to morph into a small monster. She refused to hold hands while crossing the street, so one of us had to carry her at all times. She had a small powdered sugar donut, and smiled prettily for any passer-by. When it came time to walk around the Farmer's Market, she utterly refused to budge, crying and turning into a jelly fish when one of us attempted to hold her. I told her if she didn't stop carrying on, she would get a time out right there. She sat down on the concrete, kicked both feet out in front of her, tossed her head back and howled. Dano and I looked at each other. I'm sure I looked like I wanted to throw my head back and howl right along with her. She looked fairly comical in her angelic outfit, neon light up shoes, tear-streaked face, and head in her hands sitting on the ground in the middle of the Farmer's Market. Thankfully we could barely hear her over the sounds of the market. I picked her up and plopped her little butt in the closest chair.
"You can come out when you stop your screaming." She smacked herself in the chest and tore out some of her hair.
Seconds later. "Gonna get down now, Mama." And she took leave of the seat. I plopped her right back in it. She shrieked some more. People were aware and watching at that point. I turned my back to her. Normally I walk out of the room when she's in time out, but I couldn't very well walk out of the Farmer's Market, and if anyone tried to kidnap her I figured I would hear her screams getting more distant. After a couple minutes she stopped, so she was allowed to get down. She even let me carry her without incident.
We went to lunch instead of going for pictures, due to an impending thunderstorm. Lilah chose to throw her fork at Dano, shove her plate away ("Not gonna eat the noodles"), try to wriggle down, and all manner of nonsense. Dano took her outside for a timeout at one point. We ate as fast as we could and took her home for a nap. At one point of her tearing around the restaurant with her head thrown back, laughing maniacally, a waitress said, "Aww, isn't she cute. Is she 2?" It's like people just inherently know. She's a bundle of energy and curiosity. Exactly like the Decemberists' lyric - "All fiery Irish, clip and curl. All brine and piss and vinegar" wrapped up in a 33 inch tall child.
The only question I have is, "When does it stop?"
